@48, I so often now yearn to meet people of my era and chat about the good old days. I go on nostalgic trips to when things seemed much simpler. Just yesterday, I was telling a chap that Amazon prime has ‘Yeh Jo Hai Zindagi’ and sharing a chuckle over how the theme of the week then in school would be the catchphrase of the last episode…. ’30 years ka experience!’ I often tell my kids about ‘hum chote thay tab…..’. I am not sure they comprehend the entire building going into one family’s house to see the only TV for the only movie shown in the entire week. I find myself downloading songs from my era, not because they have great merit but because they remind me of ‘those’ times. I play to a friend the theme song of ‘Fireball XL5’ the way one shares a new gizmo.


@48, I reassure myself that I am tech-savvy enough and WhatsApp is an integral part of my life. Though I must admit I feel too weary to be active on Instagram beyond having a namesake account and definitely not yet bothered to TikTok.


@48, in my case, one child is in school and one in college. Their ‘settling’ is still a few years away. I give priority to having fun with them and am glad that we thrive in each others company. I am not, cannot and need not built an empire for them to effortlessly sway over.


@48, grudges dissolve into acceptance and appreciation of the circumstances of the ‘grudged against’. You realise they form a part of your history and thereby, you. You don’t disavow yourself.


@48, the mortality of our parents would have manifested itself. I miss my dear, departed father and appreciate him and his struggles more keenly now. I value the time I am getting with my mother. I am glad that she is in good health and spirits.


@48, I have seen older relatives lose a spouse. When one has lost ones oldest companion, it leaves a heartwrenching, subtle, deep loneliness in sad eyes. You just seem to wait for the formality of the bus ride to end and take you to the inevitable last stop. But then that is life. At 48, you understand that one spouse will precede. I still find it difficult to comprehend either eventuality.


@48, I feel I have seen enough to hope to exit in a single, clean sweep rather than a lingering, tortuous end.


@48, you smile fondly with ‘apnapan’ at someone just because you know their parents and understand when the child smiles back a little uncomprehendingly. You can appreciate old facial features in a new avataar.


@48, glamour and gadgets feel hollow and empty. You value people, relationships and meaningful conversations more. You notice the dance less and dwell on the lyrics more.


@48, an occasional spot of amnesia rears its head more often than you would like to accept.


@48, either I am in denial over my physical health or just been plain lucky…..so far. I don’t know how far will the far last. I keep reminding myself to make a will.


@48, a few years difference in age does not matter. At 18, someone 5 years younger or older belonged to a different world.


@48, you turn smiling benevolently when you hear an “Uncle”.


@48, you don’t know most of the current heartthrobs, male and female. They all look the same. You might know one or two as the child of a star from your youth, though.


@48, you see today’s trends of beard and haircut as in the film stars, cricketers and the teenagers on the streets. You grin knowingly to yourself recalling your embarrassment at pictures of bell bottoms, baggy pants and long hair at back of the head taken too far.


@48, you realise so much has happened. You can write for days and yet cover only a fraction.


@48, I look back at the journey from a small, B&W Crown TV, from running to tell my friends that I had been in a building with a lift, from waiting for an hour bare-foot in peak afternoon with 25 paise coin held tightly for renting a ‘racial’ cycle, from tuning into Bella ke Phool, from licking my palm clean off the 10 paise Churan.


@48, you look at the past and say, “Mazza Aaya!”


@48, you stand before the future and say, “Bring it on!”



Disclaimer – This was written in 2019. I am much older now. :)